Monday, June 1, 2009

HEAVY METAL BBQ'd 09


Heavy Metal BBQ'd 09 was a huge success & this years attendees: TOXIC HOLOCAUST, AGGRESSOR, SLAUGHTER STRIKE, CAULDRON & MIDNIGHT CHAMPAGNE fit the roster just rite. Hats off to Craig Rose management on another fine-assed day of dynamite bbq. The spread was incredible and several can of Tiger Beer and Pabst lost thier lives in honor of the event. I was kinda' concerned about Dave not making the event. Apparently, Dave work up on someone's lawn in Kensington Market after a Biblical night of binge drinking Friday night. But in true Slimer fasion, the BBQUTIONER showed up (late) "prettied & perfumed" with a fistful of African sausages (hahahahaha. that doesn't sound right).
TOXIC lads brought a bottle of Vodka & a watermelon but didn't soak it all night, so it wasn't absorbing properly. We decided ro scoop its guts out and just fuckin pour it in and drink from the melon. Things kinda got greasy at that point.
Despite all the festivities - the ACE LANE, TORCH,
HELL, TALON, & U.D.O. sing alongs, I couldn't help obsessively thinking of the hockey game. Alas, Craig had no cable. But Philly Z had a brilliant idea to hook up an acoustic guitar to the back of the tv through a string. Finally a practical use for that goddamn instument. Worked perfectly, but it didn't help the PENS win. FUCK.

A great night all around and went into the early morning.
05:37 I woke up in the pits of hell. I felt a wave of nausea come over me not felt since the GREAT HANGOVER of'97. I ran to the washroom, but sadly did not make
it, sending a spray of puke all over the kitchen, slipped on it in my haste, puked on the walls (and EVEN the fuckin ceiling), only to make it to the toilet for a final spit and defeated sigh.
The Pens lost again that day. FUCK SUNDAYS ANYWAY.







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